When I was bound up in transgenderism, I had to deal with significant shame. I told God that I could not imagine myself going to heaven and being comfortable there. I could only imagine the other saints looking down on me because I had struggled with being effeminate. I had a total misconception of heaven.
The Apostle Paul, in 1 Corinthians 10, says, “No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it.” Note that Paul says that the particular temptations that we experience are “common to man”. What you are struggling with is not strange. Ask Jesus to show you why you are grappling with transgenderism. Knowing will help you immensely. Something happened to you, either “in utero” or after you were born that gave you this desire to be feminine.
Read the first couple verses of Hebrews 12. There the author of Hebrews says that Jesus, “… for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame …” Jesus was stripped naked, nailed to the wooden cross, and put on public display, in one of the most cruel and shaming methods of execution devised by wicked men. Jesus despised the shame that He was put through. He focused on the joy of redeeming a people for Himself and His Heavenly Father.
The psalmist David, in Psalm 69, speaks prophetically of Jesus talking to His Father while upon the cross, “You know My reproach, My shame, and My dishonor; My adversaries are all before You. Reproach has broken My heart, and I am full of heaviness; I looked for someone to take pity, but there was none; and for comforters, but I found none. They also gave Me gall for My food, and for My thirst they gave Me vinegar to drink.” Jesus did not remain in His feelings of shame … He gave them to His Father in heaven. We need to follow Christ’s example for us and give our shame to God. Psalm 55 says, “Cast your burden on the LORD, and He shall sustain you; He shall never permit the righteous to be moved.”
It is the wicked who will be put to shame. Bildad says in Job 8, “Those who hate you will be clothed with shame, and the dwelling place of the wicked will come to nothing.” The psalmist prays, “… O LORD, do not put me to shame!” Ps. 119:31